Dave Barry

Light Paperback (1 lb or less)

Massachusetts

From the Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist comes a celebration of the aging process. Not just Dave's, but that of the whole Baby Boom Generation--those millions of us who set a standard for whining self-absorption that will never be equaled, and who gave birth to such stunning accomplishments as Saturday Night Live!, the New Age movement, and call waiting. Here Dave pinpoints the glaring signs that you've passed the half-century mark:

- You are suddenly unable to read anything written in letters smaller than Marlon Brando.
- You have accepted the fact that you can't possibly be hip. You don't even know if "hip" is the right word for hip anymore, and you don't care.
- You remember nuclear-attack drills at school wherein you practiced protecting yourself by crouching under your desk, which was apparently made out of some kind of atomic-bomb-proof wood.
- You can't name the secretary of defense, but you can still sing the Mister Clean song.

So pop open a can of Geritol®, kick back in that recliner, grab those reading glasses, and let the good times roll--before they roll right over you!

Dave Barry Turns Fifty

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And no, he's not going to whine about it. In fact, he's not going to dwell on the negative aspects of turning 50 at all, like the weight gain that results from merely watching food commercials, or that you discover random hairs sprouting from unexpected sectors of your body. Instead, Dave is going to make all of you out there under the half-century mark envious with a rundown of the advantages of turning 50. For instance, you know all those newspaper articles about Middle East turmoil you read because you think you should? Dave doesn't read 'em, because with his eyes he can't! And you know all that energy you expend trying to look and sound hip? Dave doesn't, because after 50 it's hopeless and he's through trying to be one of the Boyz N the Burbz. And Dave writes not only about being 50, but also about 50 years of inventions (Oreos, Silly Putty), arts (Howdy Doody, TV commercials), politics (the Cold War, the Cold War, and more of the Cold War), and other baby boomer nostalgia. So call Dave and let him know how much you're looking forward to reading Dave Barry Turns 50. But not right now--he's sleeping. Ten Signs That You Might Be Losing It 1. You tend to forget things. 2. When you drive your car, you notice that people yell at you a lot. Often, these people are lying on your      hood. 3. On more than one occasion, while shaving, you have noticed that your razor seemed kind of dull. Upon closer examination, your razor turned out to be your toothbrush. 4. You're always searching for the right word or name. You'll be telling an anecdote, and you'll get stuck on a name, and you'll tell your listeners: "You know! That guy! With the thing! He has that thing! That guy!" And everybody will start trying to guess who you're talking about, as if you're playing charades, and finally, after ten minutes of this, it will turn out that the name you're trying to remember is: "The Pope." By this time, of course, you have no recollection of the original anecdote.   5. You sometimes address your spouse as "General Eisenhower." 6. You tend to forget things. 7. You sometimes wear a bathrobe to the office. 8. And it isn't your office. 9. It isn't your bathrobe, either. 10. You tend to forget things.

Category - Fiction / Humor

Format - Paperback

Condition - Like New

Listed - 7 months ago

Views - 2

Ships From - Massachusetts

Est. Publication Date - Aug 1999

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